MBA VS BTECH/BE

MBA Vs. B tech/B.E Student

This particular joke won an award for the best joke in a competition
organized in Britain and this joke was sent by an Indian......


A MBA and a B tech go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fell asleep.

Some hours later, the BE wakes his MBA friend.
" Look up and tell me what you see."

The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."

B tech asks: "What does that tell you?"

The MBA ponders for a minute.
" Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.

Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.

Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

What does it tell you?"

The B tech is silent for a moment, then speaks.

"Practically...Someone has stolen our tent".

" ENGINEERING = 100% COMMON SENSE”

100 % success

(if)

A = 1
B = 2
C = 3
D = 4
E = 5
F = 6
G = 7
H = 8
I = 9
J = 10
K = 11
L = 12
M = 13
N = 14
O = 15
P = 16
Q = 17
R = 18
S = 19
T = 20
U = 21
V = 22
W = 23
X = 24
Y = 25
Z = 26
______
Then

H = 8
A = 1
R = 18
D = 4
W = 23
O = 15
R = 18
K = 11

Makes 98%
______

K = 11
N = 14
O = 15
W = 23
L = 12
E = 5
D = 4
G = 7
E = 5

Makes 96%
_____

L = 12
O = 15
V = 22
E = 5

Makes 54%
_____

L = 12
U = 21
C = 3
K = 11

Makes 47%

(None of them makes 100%)
_____

Then what makes 100%??

Is it Money? ..... NO!!!

Leadership? ..... NO!!!

Every problem has a solution,
only if we perhaps change our "ATTITUDE".


It is OUR ATTITUDE towards
Life and Work that makes
OUR Life 100% Successful..

A = 1
T = 20
T = 20
I = 9
T = 20
U = 21
D = 4
E = 5
Makes 100%

T20 World Cup Schedule

Apr-10
Fri 30	1st Match, Group B - Sri Lanka v New Zealand
17:00 GMT, 01.00pm Local Time	Providence Stadium, Guyana
Fri 30	2nd Match, Group D - West Indies v Ireland
21:00 GMT, 05.00pm Local Time	Providence Stadium, Guyana
May-10
Sat 01	3rd Match, Group C - India v Afghanistan
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Sat 01	4th Match, Group A - Pakistan v Bangladesh
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Sun 02	5th Match, Group C - India v South Africa
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Sun 02	6th Match, Group A - Pakistan v Australia
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Mon 03	7th Match, Group B - Zimbabwe v Sri Lanka
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Providence Stadium, Guyana
Mon 03	8th Match, Group D - West Indies v England
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Providence Stadium, Guyana
Tue 04	9th Match, Group B - New Zealand v Zimbabwe
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Providence Stadium, Guyana
Tue 04	10th Match, Group D - England v Ireland
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Providence Stadium, Guyana
Wed 05	11th Match, Group A - Australia v Bangladesh
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Wed 05	11th Match, Group C - South Africa v Afghanistan
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Thu 06	13th Match - A1 v D2
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Thu 06	14th Match - C1 v B2
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Fri 07	15th Match - A2 v C2
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Fri 07	16th Match - B1 v D1
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Sat 08	17th Match - C1 v D2
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Sat 08	18th Match - A1 v B2
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Sun 09	19th Match - C2 v D1
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Sun 09	20th Match - B1 v A2
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados
Mon 10	21st Match - B2 v D2
13:30 GMT, 09:30am Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Mon 10	22nd Match - A1 v C1
17:30 GMT, 01:30pm Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Tue 11	23rd Match - B1 v C2
17:00 GMT, 01:00pm Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Tue 11	24th Match - D1 v A2
21:00 GMT, 05:00pm Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Thu 13	1st Semi-Final - TBC v TBC
15:30 GMT, 11:30am Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Fri 14	2nd Semi-Final - TBC v TBC
15:30 GMT, 11:30am Local Time	Beausejour Cricket Ground, St. Lucia
Sun 16	The Final - TBC v TBC
15:30 GMT, 11:30am Local Time	Kensington Oval, Barbados

College

1.college ------- yaadein

2.principal ------ Jaani Dushman

3.classes ------- kabhi kabhi

4.canteen------- kabhi alvida na kehna

5.course -------- godzilla

6.exams -------- kalyug

7.examination hall---- chamber of secret

8.exam-time ---------- qayamat se qayamt tak

9. question paper --------- paheli

10.answer paper ---------- kora kagaz

11.cheating ---------- aksar/chupke chupke

12. paper out ---------- plan

13.examiner ------------- the killer

14.last exam ----------- independence day

15.paper correction --------- andha kanoon

16.marks ----------- assambhav

17.result ----------- murder

18.pass ------------ ajjuba/ chamatkar

19. fail ----------- devdas

20.backlog exam ------- aakhri raasta ....

Feel the message

Little girl and her father were crossing a bridge.

The father was kind of scared so he asked his little daughter, "Sweetheart, please hold my hand so that you don't fall into the river."

The little girl said, "No, Dad. You hold my hand."

"What's the difference?" Asked the puzzled father.

"There's a big difference," replied the little girl.

"If I hold your hand and something happens to me, chances are that I may let your hand go. But if you hold my hand, I know for sure that no matter what happens, you will never let my hand go."

In any relationship, the essence of trust is not in its bind, but in its bond. So hold the hand of the person who loves you rather than expecting them to hold yours...

This message is too short......but carries a lot of Feel

Interesting facts

*Interesting Facts about Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy:

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain 7 letters.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's secretary was named Lincoln.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

Lincoln was shot in a theater named Kennedy.
Kennedy was shot in a car called Kennedy.

Booth ran from a theater and was caught in a warehouse.
Oswald ran from a warehouse and was caught in a theater.

Both Wilkes and Booth were assassinated before their trials

How to catch a lion

How to Catch a LION

---

Method 1 . Newton 's Method:

Let, the lion catch you.For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Implies you caught lion.

---

Method 2 . Einstein Method:

Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.

---

Method 3 : Software Engineer Method:

Catch a cat and claim that your testing has proven that its a Lion. If anyone comes back with issues tell that you will upgrade it to Lion.

---

Method 4 : Indian Police Method:

Catch any animal and interrogate it & torture it to accept that its a lion.

मैत्री

मैत्री म्हटली की
आठवतं ते बालपण
आणि मैत्रीतुन मिळालेलं
ते
खरंखुरं शहाणपण

कोणी कितीही बोललं तरी
कोणाचं काही ऐकायचं नाही
कधीही
पकडले गेलो तरी
मित्रांची नावं सांगायची नाही

मैत्रीचं हे नातं
सगळ्या
नात्यांत श्रेष्ठ
हे नातं टिकवण्यासाठी
नकोत खुप सारे कष्ट

मैत्रीचा
हा धागा
रेशमापेक्षाही मऊ सुत
मैत्रीच्या कुशीतच शमते
मायेची ती
सुप्त भुक

मैत्रीच्या सहवासात
श्रम सारे विसरता येतात
पण खरे
मित्र मिळवण्यासाठी
काहीदा कितीतरी पावसाळे जातात

मैत्री म्हणजे
रखरखत्या
उन्हात मायेची सावली
सुखाच्या दवात भिजुन
चिंब-चिंब नाहली

मैत्रीचे
बंध
कधीच नसतात तुटणारे
जुन्या आठवणींना उजाळा देउन
गालातल्या
गालात हसणारे

show more testimonials

मैत्री केली आहेस म्हणुन तुला सांगावस वाटतय

मैत्री केली आहेस म्हणुन तुला सांगावस वाटतय...

गरज म्हणून 'नातं ' कधी जोडू नकोस

सोय म्हणून सहज असं तोडू नकोस..

रक्ताचं नाही म्हणून, कवडीमोल ठरवू नकोस

भावनांचं मोल जाण..मोठेपणात हरवू नकोस..

आयुष्याच्या प्रत्येक वळणात नवं नातं जुळत असतं

जन्मभर पुरेल इतकं भरून प्रेम मिळत असतं..

तुझी ओंजळ पुढे कर, कमीपणा मानू नकोस

व्यवहारातलं देणं घेणं फक्तं मध्ये आणू नकोस..

मिळेल तितकं घेत रहा, जमेल तितकं देत रहा

दिलं घेतलं सरेल तेव्हा.. पुन्हा मागून घेत रहा..

समाधानात तडजोड असते...फक्त जरा समजून घे

'नातं ' म्हणजे ओझं नाही, मनापासून उमजून घे..

विश्वासाचे चार शब्दं..दुसरं काही देऊ नकोस

जाणीवपूर्वक 'नातं ' जप , मध्येच माघार घेऊ नकोस...!

आता कंटाळा खूप झाला

आता कंटाळा खूप झाला

कामाला लागलं पाहिजे

स्वप्नांच्या पूर्तीसाठी

आता जागलं पाहिजे

मला जमत नाही म्हणून

आता चिडायचं नाही

माझं कसं होईल असं

म्हणत कुढायचं नाही


कमकुवत शब्दांना

पुरून टाकलं पाहिजे

स्वप्नांच्या पूर्तीसाठी

आता जागलं पाहिजे


येत नाही तिथे तिथे

प्रयत्न करीन म्हणायचं

सर्व अडचणींना

अगदी पुरून उरायचं


दुर्दम्य आशावाद

घेऊन जगलं पाहिजे

स्वप्नांच्या पूर्तीसाठी

आता जागलं पाहिजे

IPL Season 3 Schedule

S. No.	Date and Time	Team One	Team Two	Venue
IPL Match 1	12th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Deccan Chargers	Kolkata Knight Riders	Navi Mumbai
IPL Match 2	13th March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Mumbai Indians	Rajasthan Royals	Mumbai
IPL Match 3	13th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kings XI Punjab	Delhi Daredevils	Mohali
IPL Match 4	14th March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Chennai Super Kings	Deccan Chargers	Chennai
IPL Match 5	14th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kolkata Knight Riders	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Kolkata
IPL Match 6	15th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Rajasthan Royals	Delhi Daredevils	Jaipur
IPL Match 7	16th March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Kings XI Punjab	Bangalore
IPL Match 8	16th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kolkata Knight Riders	Chennai Super Kings	Kolkata
IPL Match 9	17th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Delhi Daredevils	Mumbai Indians	Delhi
IPL Match 10	18th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Rajasthan Royals	Bangalore
IPL Match 11	19th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Deccan Chargers	Kings XI Punjab	Nagpur
IPL Match 12	20th March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Rajasthan Royals	Kolkata Knight Riders	Ahmedabad
IPL Match 13	20th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Mumbai Indians	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Mumbai
IPL Match 14	21st March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Chennai Super Kings	Kings XI Punjab	Chennai
IPL Match 15	21st March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Delhi Daredevils	Deccan Chargers	Nagpur
IPL Match 16	22nd March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Mumbai Indians	Kolkata Knight Riders	Mumbai
IPL Match 17	23rd March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Chennai Super Kings	Bangalore
IPL Match 18	24th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kings XI Punjab	Rajasthan Royals	Mohali
IPL Match 19	25th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kolkata Knight Riders	Delhi Daredevils	Kolkata
IPL Match 20	26th March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Chennai Super Kings	Mumbai Indians	Chennai
IPL Match 21	26th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Rajasthan Royals	Deccan Chargers	Ahmedabad
IPL Match 22	27th March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Delhi Daredevils	Bangalore
IPL Match 23	27th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kings XI Punjab	Kolkata Knight Riders	Mohali
IPL Match 24	28th March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Rajasthan Royals	Chennai Super Kings	Ahmedabad
IPL Match 25	28th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Deccan Chargers	Mumbai Indians	Nagpur
IPL Match 26	29th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Delhi Daredevils	Kolkata Knight Riders	Delhi
IPL Match 27	30th March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Mumbai Indians	Kings XI Punjab	Mumbai
IPL Match 28	31st March, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Chennai Super Kings	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Chennai
IPL Match 29	31st March, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Delhi Daredevils	Rajasthan Royals	Delhi
IPL Match 30	1st April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kolkata Knight Riders	Deccan Chargers	Kolkata
IPL Match 31	2nd April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kings XI Punjab	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Mohali
IPL Match 32	3rd April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Chennai Super Kings	Rajasthan Royals	Chennai
IPL Match 33	3rd April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Mumbai Indians	Deccan Chargers	Nagpur
IPL Match 34	4th April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Delhi Daredevils	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Delhi
IPL Match 35	4th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kolkata Knight Riders	Kings XI Punjab	Kolkata
IPL Match 36	5th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Deccan Chargers	Rajasthan Royals	Navi Mumbai
IPL Match 37	6th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Mumbai Indians	Chennai Super Kings	Chennai
IPL Match 38	7th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Rajasthan Royals	Kings XI Punjab	Ahmedabad
IPL Match 39	8th April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Deccan Chargers	Bangalore
IPL Match 40	8th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Chennai Super Kings	Delhi Daredevils	Chennai
IPL Match 41	9th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kings XI Punjab	Mumbai Indians	Mohali
IPL Match 42	10th April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Kolkata Knight Riders	Bangalore
IPL Match 43	10th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Deccan Chargers	Chennai Super Kings	Navi Mumbai
IPL Match 44	11th April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Rajasthan Royals	Mumbai Indians	Jaipur
IPL Match 45	11th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Delhi Daredevils	Kings XI Punjab	Delhi
IPL Match 46	12th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Deccan Chargers	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Navi Mumbai
IPL Match 47	13th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Chennai Super Kings	Kolkata Knight Riders	Chennai
IPL Match 48	14th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Mumbai Indians	Delhi Daredevils	Mumbai
IPL Match 49	15th April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Rajasthan Royals	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Jaipur
IPL Match 50	15th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kings XI Punjab	Deccan Chargers	Dharamsala
IPL Match 51	16th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Delhi Daredevils	Chennai Super Kings	Delhi
IPL Match 52	17th April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Royal Challengers Bangalore	Mumbai Indians	Bangalore
IPL Match 53	17th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kolkata Knight Riders	Rajasthan Royals	Kolkata
IPL Match 54	18th April, 2010, 4 P.M IST	Deccan Chargers	Delhi Daredevils	Delhi
IPL Match 55	18th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kings XI Punjab	Chennai Super Kings	Dharamsala
IPL Match 56	19th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Kolkata Knight Riders	Mumbai Indians	Kolkata
1st Semifinal	21st April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Team 1	Team 2	Banglore
2nd Semifinal	22nd April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Team 3	Team 4	Banglore
Play-off for 3rd place	24nd April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Team A	Team B	Navi Mumbai
Final	25th April, 2010, 8 P.M IST	Team 1	Team 2	Navi Mumbai